Good morning dears! You would not believe how cold it is here in Namibia! I really am not complaining because I know it will be soo hot in KC. I am just shocked though! I don't know how cold it is, but I know I used 4 blankets on my bed lastnight!
Anyway, I am enjoying all the sorts of extremes in my living situation in the past weeks! I went from cold showers and small meals, to hot showers and huge meals, to now dinners consisting sometimes of stale bread and butter and tea. But really really, I am learning to be greatful in every situation. I can see why someone who does not think they have the things they "need" in life might begin longing for what others have. I laughed at myself yesterday at a meal when I was looking over at someones unfinnished plate. I actually wanted it! I didn't take it, and reminded myself I shouldn't want what others have. It's like the lessons you teach a child! Oh me!
Welp, we had a birthday party for Gustav Saturday evening. Did I tell you already? He turned 12. So cute! He was a happy guy! Though I nearly cried when in the middle of his celebration, the woman who is now in charge here stopped the whole thing. About 5 kids had stolen from another volunteer and they were all being punnished right in the middle of it! Not my style of discipline! It wasn't even Gustav who had done wrong!
The kids here do still need constant prayer! I see that while Pop Jansen is present (She's in charge), they are nearly angelic, but the moment she is away they are worse rascals than I remember! I am glad for Aaron who is here from Wisconsin. He has a gift of teaching and really is a great father figure for the kids. But he is only here for a few weeks. We both agree that they need someone long term.....
Well dears, see you!
Monday, June 29, 2009
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Souchef at the Guestfarm
Well my friends, flexibility makes the best missionary, right? I am learning this trade and it can really be quite fun once you let go of all your own agendas or ideas about certain ways of things and how they should unfold.
After one day at the Haven I was wisked 4 hours north to Otavi. This is the farm Shtefan and Anja run. Anja was a bit sick and so really needed my help (and company). I became best buddy to Fin-Luka ;)!!!! as well as sou chef to Anja- she's an amazing cook. I know this all sounds quite confusing. They had guests and needed my help. So with an hours notice I left my darlings at the Haven and headed up north. I stayed much longer than I wanted which has me rather sad because it cuts down on my time at the Haven by more than I like to think about. I was supposed to stay until Wednesday which turned into Thursday,.....and now it's Saturday!
Once again, the Lord had his reasons for bringing me so far from the Haven and had a lot to teach me and show me. He really is the best husband and does things so well!
Okay my dearhearts, I will talk again soon I hope! Love, Amanda
After one day at the Haven I was wisked 4 hours north to Otavi. This is the farm Shtefan and Anja run. Anja was a bit sick and so really needed my help (and company). I became best buddy to Fin-Luka ;)!!!! as well as sou chef to Anja- she's an amazing cook. I know this all sounds quite confusing. They had guests and needed my help. So with an hours notice I left my darlings at the Haven and headed up north. I stayed much longer than I wanted which has me rather sad because it cuts down on my time at the Haven by more than I like to think about. I was supposed to stay until Wednesday which turned into Thursday,.....and now it's Saturday!
Once again, the Lord had his reasons for bringing me so far from the Haven and had a lot to teach me and show me. He really is the best husband and does things so well!
Okay my dearhearts, I will talk again soon I hope! Love, Amanda
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Sweet Reunion!!!
I am writing to you today with such a happy happy heart! The Lord has really made me such a happy lady!
I arrived at the Haven yesterday evening. My darlings spotted me right away and came running to hug me tightly one after another. I could have burst with all the love and joy that swelled up in my heart for them. I just couldn't stop smiling for a good hour at least. I didn't want to go to bed either. I just wanted to stay up all night talking to the girls and catching up.
It was a bit sad at the same time though because several of the children are no longer here. There are many new faces however, and such darlings they are as well!
I can tell you also that from the moment I entered the Haven I could tell that the spiritual atmosphere had changed soo much. Where once there was heaviness and opression, now there is such ease. The children are so hungry for God it amazes me! One new girl said to me last night, "I know that in Heaven is a book with names in it, and when I get to heaven the angel will open the door and look in the book, but I do not know how to get my name in that book. You must tell us about God."
All the kids who had been here before were asking right away for Bible lessons. I am thrilled to share with them all that is in my heart from Jesus for them. Please pray that all goes so well here!
I love you all! Blessings, Amanda
I arrived at the Haven yesterday evening. My darlings spotted me right away and came running to hug me tightly one after another. I could have burst with all the love and joy that swelled up in my heart for them. I just couldn't stop smiling for a good hour at least. I didn't want to go to bed either. I just wanted to stay up all night talking to the girls and catching up.
It was a bit sad at the same time though because several of the children are no longer here. There are many new faces however, and such darlings they are as well!
I can tell you also that from the moment I entered the Haven I could tell that the spiritual atmosphere had changed soo much. Where once there was heaviness and opression, now there is such ease. The children are so hungry for God it amazes me! One new girl said to me last night, "I know that in Heaven is a book with names in it, and when I get to heaven the angel will open the door and look in the book, but I do not know how to get my name in that book. You must tell us about God."
All the kids who had been here before were asking right away for Bible lessons. I am thrilled to share with them all that is in my heart from Jesus for them. Please pray that all goes so well here!
I love you all! Blessings, Amanda
Friday, June 19, 2009
Am I there yet?
Hello dear hearts! I am on my way to Namibia now (I am in Namibia, just not all the way to where I am headed-I forget how long travel can take here and it's testing my patience when all I want is to instantly be with the ones I love!!)
I woke up this morning in a sort of shocking way, almost unwelcoming to my ears-SILENCE. No little voices calling, no cries or giggles or screams. I laid in my bed thinking about how blessed I have been for the last nearly 3 weeks. Just two nights ago I fell asleep with a little infant boy in my arms. Who is so lucky to have so many babies at their finger tips at every moment of the day? They are so warm and cuddly, and perfectly fitting. I thank Jesus for every day that He let me stay in that House of Love in Mozambique. I will miss those babes!!!
It was especially hard to say goodbye to little Dene! The doctors have said that he is about 15 months old. He hadn't attached to anyone, but he always came to me crying and wanting to be picked up or redirected to some fun diversion. We were learning to say "hola" together. His little laugh and his little cry both left his face in the cutest scrunchy nosed way. When I said goodbye to him he waved down the road saying "tata," but having no idea I wouldn't be back soon. The other children are either to young to know I have left, or old enough to know that visitors come and go....but he had only just come before I got there. I hate that he is experiencing another person leaving him!!!! It breaks my heart!!!! There have been a couple children here with whom I have said to myself, "If Moz let foreigners adopt I would seriously be considering what my life would be like as a single mommy!" But the Lord has his plans for each of us. In His time....
Welp, I am not totally sure what is happening here in Namibia. Because the airport is so far from my destination, it has been difficult getting me from here to there. I am not sure if I will arrive today or tomorrow. Oy, so sad! I am, however, staying with Stephan and Anja's aunt and uncle for now and they have the most peaceful cute little place here in Windhoek. I am blessed to be here! I had a delicious bowl of cereal this morning and I am smiling:)! Love to you all as always, Amanda
p.s. Thanks for all your comments Barbera! Yes, I am happy to be "mommy" for this little while!
Monica, I sent you a message about my bills, they are automatically paid for through my account, so no worries sista!
Jenni! and Lauren! I lost your adresses or else I'd send you a postcard!
I woke up this morning in a sort of shocking way, almost unwelcoming to my ears-SILENCE. No little voices calling, no cries or giggles or screams. I laid in my bed thinking about how blessed I have been for the last nearly 3 weeks. Just two nights ago I fell asleep with a little infant boy in my arms. Who is so lucky to have so many babies at their finger tips at every moment of the day? They are so warm and cuddly, and perfectly fitting. I thank Jesus for every day that He let me stay in that House of Love in Mozambique. I will miss those babes!!!
It was especially hard to say goodbye to little Dene! The doctors have said that he is about 15 months old. He hadn't attached to anyone, but he always came to me crying and wanting to be picked up or redirected to some fun diversion. We were learning to say "hola" together. His little laugh and his little cry both left his face in the cutest scrunchy nosed way. When I said goodbye to him he waved down the road saying "tata," but having no idea I wouldn't be back soon. The other children are either to young to know I have left, or old enough to know that visitors come and go....but he had only just come before I got there. I hate that he is experiencing another person leaving him!!!! It breaks my heart!!!! There have been a couple children here with whom I have said to myself, "If Moz let foreigners adopt I would seriously be considering what my life would be like as a single mommy!" But the Lord has his plans for each of us. In His time....
Welp, I am not totally sure what is happening here in Namibia. Because the airport is so far from my destination, it has been difficult getting me from here to there. I am not sure if I will arrive today or tomorrow. Oy, so sad! I am, however, staying with Stephan and Anja's aunt and uncle for now and they have the most peaceful cute little place here in Windhoek. I am blessed to be here! I had a delicious bowl of cereal this morning and I am smiling:)! Love to you all as always, Amanda
p.s. Thanks for all your comments Barbera! Yes, I am happy to be "mommy" for this little while!
Monica, I sent you a message about my bills, they are automatically paid for through my account, so no worries sista!
Jenni! and Lauren! I lost your adresses or else I'd send you a postcard!
Monday, June 15, 2009
Mommy Wrinkles!!
This update is being written in honor of my darling sister Tricia, amazing mother of 4 beautiful daughters who look just like her! I hope your reading this Tricia!
I was walking towards the house today and when I looked down at the underside of my left forearm, I had wrinkles! My sister calls such wrinkles "mommy wrinkles" because they are the marks left behind from spending hours holding babies. My sister has so far spent 6 years holding babies, I have only just begun. I do not think she gets quite as excited about those mommy wrinkles as I did. And mine have since faded while hers are permanent, I think. Anyway I am often thinking of my sister and my other young mommy friends. Those with toddlers and "strong willed" children. I am now experiencing what they experience, x 14!!!!!!!
I am constantly asking the Lord to show my His love for the children. I would love to love them as my own children, but I have no way of knowing if I am because I have never had my own children. I have my nieces, and I love these kids like I love them....but I am still so curious to know a mother's love. So last night I had a dream. It was just a dream, but so real. I was in the midst of my future orphanage, and I had my own baby their before me. It (I am not sure if it was he or she) was the most beautiful thing I had ever laid eyes on! Wide eyes and dark hair, round little face with chubby cheeks. It just looked at me and I was so in love. All day I keep thinking about this baby, as if it is real! So funny isn't it!!
Welp, as far as updates go, there isn't much different to say. Just still loving and going on with the life that is before me here. I have 4 days left here and then on my way to Namibia!!!!!! Hope to update you again before I leave. Take care!!!!
I was walking towards the house today and when I looked down at the underside of my left forearm, I had wrinkles! My sister calls such wrinkles "mommy wrinkles" because they are the marks left behind from spending hours holding babies. My sister has so far spent 6 years holding babies, I have only just begun. I do not think she gets quite as excited about those mommy wrinkles as I did. And mine have since faded while hers are permanent, I think. Anyway I am often thinking of my sister and my other young mommy friends. Those with toddlers and "strong willed" children. I am now experiencing what they experience, x 14!!!!!!!
I am constantly asking the Lord to show my His love for the children. I would love to love them as my own children, but I have no way of knowing if I am because I have never had my own children. I have my nieces, and I love these kids like I love them....but I am still so curious to know a mother's love. So last night I had a dream. It was just a dream, but so real. I was in the midst of my future orphanage, and I had my own baby their before me. It (I am not sure if it was he or she) was the most beautiful thing I had ever laid eyes on! Wide eyes and dark hair, round little face with chubby cheeks. It just looked at me and I was so in love. All day I keep thinking about this baby, as if it is real! So funny isn't it!!
Welp, as far as updates go, there isn't much different to say. Just still loving and going on with the life that is before me here. I have 4 days left here and then on my way to Namibia!!!!!! Hope to update you again before I leave. Take care!!!!
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Jezoosh Deesh "amooti!" means Jesus says, "I love you!"
Happy Saturday! It is Saturday here in Mozambique. It has been over a week since sending out my love to you all yes? To my sister Nichole I want to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! I know it was last week Saturday, and I wanted to send hugs ontop of hugs and then some more hugs! I love you!!!!!
Saturday doesn't mean the work is any slower around here, but it is still a beautiful day!!!!! You guys! I am being so pruned and trained and grown. It is really very exciting for me!!!! When I think of the overall sum of my days here, at first glance they can look like this: drowning in poop, throw up, pee, and unknown objects by the second along with earfuls of screams and loud voices, things being spilled, swiped, pulled out, trouble making all around. If you stand still in all of it you see this: A little girl picking flowers, a little boy pulling his own little toy, laughter in the next room. You see curious little wide eyed learners, playful little ones so eager to love and be loved. When you then feel the baby in your arms who's just peed on you, you recognize their name is not just Lindina or Jonah, but JESUS!!!! Beautiful Jesus! He is the one you care for when you care for the wounded little ones. It's the same whoever you lend your love to, wherever you are!
These kids are not the only learners, I am learning most! They are my teachers of all things!!! On top of that I am found in Hebrews where I am so fond of my Great High Priest who is above even the Heavens and who knows all my weaknesses and has known them first hand. The one who prays for me and has made the sacrifice that I could never make. He is beautiful and turning my love into real alive love to be given purely. Not anything I could ever conjure up of my own.
Oh my dears, I wish I were able to really sit down with more time and quiet and concentration and then maybe this little update to you would not feel so scattered and scrambled in my mind:)!!!!
Prayer Requests:
Dene: We think he might be maybe 18months old or so, and we think he has aids. He was abandoned by his mom and his dad is in jail. He has these wounds that won't heal and are now getting even worse. He cries alot. Some is his need for love and some is his pain from these wounds. Pray for quick healing.
Sean: a guy here also from KC. We are concerned he might have malaria. He gets very sick on and off which is similar to malaria symptoms. We are praying for his healing.
Praises to Jesus because little Hawa is more and more herself all the time. She plays with us now and laughs....she was my flower picker this morning:)
Two of the little girls, Telma and Quiterria had to have their heads shaved and now are being treated for head fungus(the same thing I had to treat the kids in Namibia for that Jesus miraculously healed!) He will do it again!
There is a second baby house and the kids are growing out of it. It is just too small! There have been no options open for them to move into. Please pray for one to show up quickly!!!!
I love you all! love, Amanda
Saturday doesn't mean the work is any slower around here, but it is still a beautiful day!!!!! You guys! I am being so pruned and trained and grown. It is really very exciting for me!!!! When I think of the overall sum of my days here, at first glance they can look like this: drowning in poop, throw up, pee, and unknown objects by the second along with earfuls of screams and loud voices, things being spilled, swiped, pulled out, trouble making all around. If you stand still in all of it you see this: A little girl picking flowers, a little boy pulling his own little toy, laughter in the next room. You see curious little wide eyed learners, playful little ones so eager to love and be loved. When you then feel the baby in your arms who's just peed on you, you recognize their name is not just Lindina or Jonah, but JESUS!!!! Beautiful Jesus! He is the one you care for when you care for the wounded little ones. It's the same whoever you lend your love to, wherever you are!
These kids are not the only learners, I am learning most! They are my teachers of all things!!! On top of that I am found in Hebrews where I am so fond of my Great High Priest who is above even the Heavens and who knows all my weaknesses and has known them first hand. The one who prays for me and has made the sacrifice that I could never make. He is beautiful and turning my love into real alive love to be given purely. Not anything I could ever conjure up of my own.
Oh my dears, I wish I were able to really sit down with more time and quiet and concentration and then maybe this little update to you would not feel so scattered and scrambled in my mind:)!!!!
Prayer Requests:
Dene: We think he might be maybe 18months old or so, and we think he has aids. He was abandoned by his mom and his dad is in jail. He has these wounds that won't heal and are now getting even worse. He cries alot. Some is his need for love and some is his pain from these wounds. Pray for quick healing.
Sean: a guy here also from KC. We are concerned he might have malaria. He gets very sick on and off which is similar to malaria symptoms. We are praying for his healing.
Praises to Jesus because little Hawa is more and more herself all the time. She plays with us now and laughs....she was my flower picker this morning:)
Two of the little girls, Telma and Quiterria had to have their heads shaved and now are being treated for head fungus(the same thing I had to treat the kids in Namibia for that Jesus miraculously healed!) He will do it again!
There is a second baby house and the kids are growing out of it. It is just too small! There have been no options open for them to move into. Please pray for one to show up quickly!!!!
I love you all! love, Amanda
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Jezoosh Deesh "Amooti!"
Hola! I have some updates for you my dears! I haven't been online for quite a while so you are probably wondering what's up.....
Welp first, by the Lord's hand I am no longer going to be going on to Swaziland. It is by what I have been told is "TIA" (This is Africa). My missionary friend's car in Swazi was unknowingly a stollen car before it was sold to them. This means that they were unable to cross the border into Mozambique to get me. It is a bummer for me, but I have such assurance that this is the Lord's will, and I am happy here.
I have more to say, but sadly my internet time is already up. But at least you know this and so I will leave you with one thought:
If Jesus were to come into an orphanage of toddlers and babies, crazy with children running and making trouble and so much to be done would he do this or this?:
Would he join the line of changing diaper after diaper and trying to control crazy chidren, or would he lay in bed next to the 3 year old with AIDS who just came home from the hospital and is still very weak, singing her songs and rubbing her belly?
Welp first, by the Lord's hand I am no longer going to be going on to Swaziland. It is by what I have been told is "TIA" (This is Africa). My missionary friend's car in Swazi was unknowingly a stollen car before it was sold to them. This means that they were unable to cross the border into Mozambique to get me. It is a bummer for me, but I have such assurance that this is the Lord's will, and I am happy here.
I have more to say, but sadly my internet time is already up. But at least you know this and so I will leave you with one thought:
If Jesus were to come into an orphanage of toddlers and babies, crazy with children running and making trouble and so much to be done would he do this or this?:
Would he join the line of changing diaper after diaper and trying to control crazy chidren, or would he lay in bed next to the 3 year old with AIDS who just came home from the hospital and is still very weak, singing her songs and rubbing her belly?
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Beautiful Jesus!!!!
Oh my heavens! Oh my stars! Oh my beautiful beautiful Jesus!!!!!!!!
My dears, I have you in my heart tonight, wanting you all to experience the beauty of the Lord! You can imagine how the last few days have had their rough moments. To be honest, but short, there have been those moments of big questions and flashback memories of all that happened on Tuesday. I know what is truth, and that Jesus reigns over all and is in full control....the enemy does not like me to think so and he is the one who trys to get me down. But I cling to the Lord and He is so so so so faithful!
Every morning I wake up to children's little voices calling. When I look at them I am looking at Jesus. He is right with me at every moment. I got to experience a baby's first smile this morning! Another little one who has been through such trauma and just came to us recently, woke up this morning with such joy!!!! I could go on with stories of the kids here. I watch them walking around or coming up to me for hugs and holding, for every need.....and I just see beautiful Jesus. I am so content in these moments. I love to just sit with the babies, one in my arms two in a stroller, one by my side as I try to get them smiling and cooing. I love the way the sun comes into the backyard as I walk along with a baby in arms as I feed him his bottle. I love to do my laundry and help with the dishes. I love being here! It is the grace of the Lord who has made it so! Don't think me an angel who just does these amazing things, if I did not have his Holy Sprit, I would be useless.
Okay, so this is already too long. I don't like to write this long. Jesus is beautiful!
JENNI!!!!!!!!! Congratulations second mama to baby Olive!!!! all my love, Amanda
P.S.: Prayers: Tomorrow is Americu's funeral
Little Hawa is still in hospital and needs a miracle!!!
Idrussi's ears are so infected and need healing.
Pieter and Rika still in need of comfort and peace!
My dears, I have you in my heart tonight, wanting you all to experience the beauty of the Lord! You can imagine how the last few days have had their rough moments. To be honest, but short, there have been those moments of big questions and flashback memories of all that happened on Tuesday. I know what is truth, and that Jesus reigns over all and is in full control....the enemy does not like me to think so and he is the one who trys to get me down. But I cling to the Lord and He is so so so so faithful!
Every morning I wake up to children's little voices calling. When I look at them I am looking at Jesus. He is right with me at every moment. I got to experience a baby's first smile this morning! Another little one who has been through such trauma and just came to us recently, woke up this morning with such joy!!!! I could go on with stories of the kids here. I watch them walking around or coming up to me for hugs and holding, for every need.....and I just see beautiful Jesus. I am so content in these moments. I love to just sit with the babies, one in my arms two in a stroller, one by my side as I try to get them smiling and cooing. I love the way the sun comes into the backyard as I walk along with a baby in arms as I feed him his bottle. I love to do my laundry and help with the dishes. I love being here! It is the grace of the Lord who has made it so! Don't think me an angel who just does these amazing things, if I did not have his Holy Sprit, I would be useless.
Okay, so this is already too long. I don't like to write this long. Jesus is beautiful!
JENNI!!!!!!!!! Congratulations second mama to baby Olive!!!! all my love, Amanda
P.S.: Prayers: Tomorrow is Americu's funeral
Little Hawa is still in hospital and needs a miracle!!!
Idrussi's ears are so infected and need healing.
Pieter and Rika still in need of comfort and peace!
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Jesus is Still Victor
Hello my dear friends. I am writing to you today, unsure exactly what to say other than that am calling for your prayers. Please, not just kind thoughts, though that is nice, but real true prayers. Wherever you are, just grab another Jesus lover and pray.
This morning little Americo went from my arms into the arms of Jesus. He was so so sick with AIDS. He was such a little fighter. Even just yesterday we finally found food he would like to eat. The past two nights he has slept on my chest and by my side. I felt a mother's love over him. I felt what Jesus feels for the orphaned child. This morning in his sleep he made the cutest little baby noises. But when it came time to wake him, he would not wake easily and I saw that his breathing was not right. We rushed him to the hospital, but the staff there were of no help at all.
Last night as I held him and fell asleep, there were these worshipful songs coming out of me for him that I knew were straight from the heart of God, because I did not think of doing that on my own. I know Jesus could have kept Americo with us as the little fighter who grew so strong and amazed everyone....but Jesus has the plan that no man has. I am full of joy when I think of Americo alive with Christ in the Heavenly places.
Still it is a very difficult time here. My heart aches for Pieter and Rika and the family. How much can one family take? Please pray for comfort and joy. Pray for great breakthrough in the Spirit. The enemy has no place in this home. This is the House of God!!!!! Please please pray for us. Sending my love in Christ, Amanda
Blessed are those who mourn, they will be comforted. Matt 5:4
This morning little Americo went from my arms into the arms of Jesus. He was so so sick with AIDS. He was such a little fighter. Even just yesterday we finally found food he would like to eat. The past two nights he has slept on my chest and by my side. I felt a mother's love over him. I felt what Jesus feels for the orphaned child. This morning in his sleep he made the cutest little baby noises. But when it came time to wake him, he would not wake easily and I saw that his breathing was not right. We rushed him to the hospital, but the staff there were of no help at all.
Last night as I held him and fell asleep, there were these worshipful songs coming out of me for him that I knew were straight from the heart of God, because I did not think of doing that on my own. I know Jesus could have kept Americo with us as the little fighter who grew so strong and amazed everyone....but Jesus has the plan that no man has. I am full of joy when I think of Americo alive with Christ in the Heavenly places.
Still it is a very difficult time here. My heart aches for Pieter and Rika and the family. How much can one family take? Please pray for comfort and joy. Pray for great breakthrough in the Spirit. The enemy has no place in this home. This is the House of God!!!!! Please please pray for us. Sending my love in Christ, Amanda
Blessed are those who mourn, they will be comforted. Matt 5:4
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